Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Please Don't Shoot Me White Lady....

Did you know that White people are allowed to do whatever they want to at work? They can have a nervous breakdown on Monday......personally call everyone in the office on Tuesday and say all kinds of completely crazy shit........have their spouse call and repeat said crazy shit the next day.........resign....okay training for their replacement........send out "it's been nice working with you all" emails on Thursday........and then RETURN TO WORK ON MONDAY LIKE NOTHING EVER HAPPENED!!!!!!!!!!

Who does this shit?!? Only White people!

We all know that I'm as crazy as a box of rocks, however, I know damn well not to let the crazy rocks spill over at work. Black people know how far to take the "crazy." I know the moment my crazy rocks fall on the floor beside my desk there will be a pink note handed to me. It will be hand delivered - no inter office mail for that shit. The delivery will be executed by Office Security. In addition to handing me the pink note, they will hand me my purse and tell me to get the hell out!

Since the "White and Crazy" is my supervisor - the situation is effecting me directly. She vacillates between hosting meetings to lay down the "new law" and crying hysterically. Senior management is either afraid of her or they don't give a damn. So, I'm finding alternative ways to get to the bathroom that don't include passing her office door and mapping out an escape route in the event she comes in shooting.

It sure must be nice to be a white woman.


Man Can - One Love said...

I don't know....I've never been white. But, if you could do all that shit and get away with it, I think it might want to be white for at least 2 days out of the week. That's all I need....Hell I'll take one!
What Lyfe say....Must Be Nice.

Angie said...

Man-can, You would not make a good white woman. First of all you tell the truth too much. Second of all, you don't do too well with plotting and planning other's demise. You're too busy taking naps and taking care of the "Mayor". LOL : )

Mahogany Brown said...

It can't be nice to be a white woman...well unless you're Coco-T because well lets face it she's pretty stacked lol. Other than that, you'd have a flat booty, only talk about how many points/calories/grams of fat are in rice cakes, and probably be married to a man with a small umm...let me stop here lol.

I hope you don't work in the post office. Sounds like she might blow any minute!

Liz said...

Yeah, my ex-boss could lose TWO $1000 projectors, leave a laptop in her unlocked car, constantly forget meeting materials and be late to everything under the sun and it didn't matter. There's such a double standard. They can do anything and if we even have a bad day and aren't cheery as can be, then folks want to trip out on us.

Angie said...

@ M. Boogie B - I know we sound racist as hell....but it's the truth.

@ Liz - girl if "we" lose a pencil around this mug there will be a federal investigation.......however, "they" can lose the damn building and it's all good.

West said...

I've seen plenty of "crazy rocks" tossed about by the white folks in the workplace and it's tolerated to an unbelievable degree.

As you say, even the hint of the sound of a single pebble from Black folks and it's time for a meeting about workplace expectations.