Monday, February 19, 2007

What Men Really Want...........

If you follow my directions to a "T", you are guaranteed to acquire the man your heart desires. I have done extensive research and these results are tried and true. I have spoken with both sexes, taken polls (not poles : ) ), and I've compiled the facts for your edification.

Ready? Here goes.

Men want you to lie to them. That's right boys and girls they do not want you tell the truth. Don't even whisper it! They don't want you to;

ask what you want of them. They'd rather you play games, trick and connive to get what you want from them. Ask for hundreds of dollars for pretend pregnancy terminations when you want to go shopping, or need to pay a bill. You can use this over and over. That way they can call you a "trick, or gold digger".

ask them for what you want in bed. They'd rather you fake an orgasm or just shut the hell up. God forbid you tell them what you like, unless it's the exact same shit that they like, their feelings will be hurt. You will have stepped on their manhood. Either wait until you are alone and handle your business or get "some help". I'll let you figure that one out.

tell them what you really think about their, boys, mother, or wardrobe. This one is self explanatory.

be sensible and talk a situation out. They want you to cut up and act a fool. They want you to show up at the club, break a beer bottle on the bar and hold it underneath their neck while you curse and threaten them. Now he can call you crazy. They love crazy. They keep crazy women around for ever!

NO telling the truth. Try it. Let me know how well it works for you.


West said...

No doubt there are men -and women- like this. Luckily, I'm not one of them.

I can't speak for the next man.

Angie said...

West - sad but true. There are women like this too.

The Sarcasticynic said...

Sorry, I can't get past "stepped on their manhood."