Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Serial Dating 4 - So how long were you in jail?

After I licked my wounds, and sulked for a while - I took your advice and got back on the horse, so to speak. Back to serial dating. Mind you, I have a lot of balls in the air, so I haven't been on it like before, but here goes.

Let's call this guy "Fuzzy Pimp Coat", (he had a fuzzy pimp coat on in one of his profile pictures). I'm from Louisiana, so any man wearing a coat with fur around the collar looks uhhm.... what we call "pimpish". I like a little swagger, but a pimp coat? C'mon! Anyhow, the guy kept sending me messages and finally I responded. We chat and exchange numbers. Yep, that's how it always starts. They sound so normal at first.

The long and short of it is he was released in 2004 after a 15 year prison stint (d.r.u.g.s. !!!!!), and he has an 8 MONTH old and a 9 MONTH old. He says he wants a wife. I effen kid you not!

WHY?!?

Why is he trying to find another woman? Why do these people always like me? Why did he think I would date him with the super size luxury bags of drama he has? No thank you Mr. Fuzzy Pimp Coat.

The African is starting to look pretty good at this point. : (

10 comments:

TDJ said...

*LOL* I'm actually cracking up and my husband is trying to figure out the joke. A pimp coat? Gurl, stop! And two infants? Run!
BTW, have you tried looking for anyone or are you just responding to the ones that contact you?

Angie said...

To tdj: Girl, I didn't even go into all of the "other" stuff. It's just too funny. I contact some and some contact me. But, the ones I contact are just as crazy as the ones who contact me. LOL

Knockout Zed said...

I hope you don't kick it with this cat. Not even for a minute.

KZ

James Burnett said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I'm sorry Angie, I couldn't help it.

What in the hell kind of perfume are you wearing?

You know what it is. These guys smell stability on you. They smell/see a woman they know is level. And they're just loserish to think that you can be the stable one for both of you.

Give this fool the boot. And forget the African. Get back on the horse for the fifth round.

TDJ said...

I'm with James - try again! :)

Angie said...

I'm not ready to give up but damn, this is taxing. I just want to exchange folders with them. The folder should be labled "all the shit wrong with me". Let's read each other's folders and take it from there. : )

Zed, don't worry - no kicking it with the convict baby maker.

James, it's gotten so I don't even want to talk to them. It's like that movie Groundhog Day. The same thing every day, just a different clown.

TDJ, I need an agent, someone to pick through the pile first. LOL

TDJ said...

Yeah, a dating screener. Kinda like the phone interview before the in person job interview. *lol* All single folks should be so lucky!

James Burnett said...

I'll be your agent, but I want the standard 15% cut.

Angie said...

Now how would we work that out James. Without breaking the law, or your marraige vows. : )

Femigog said...

Okay girl! No he is not looking for baby momma number 3!!!!!